I started walking with Jesus at the age of 24. It was right after I left the strip club after 4 years of having money, clout and materialism, but all at the price of peace, joy, and true love. I decided enough was enough. I was tired of the emotional roller coasters. I was tired of being attacked in my thoughts to take my own life. I was tired of being bound by lust and drugs. I made myself out to be so confident, but deep down I was so insecure. I constantly needed approval of others to feel worthy and beautiful. Deep down, I knew the life I was living was wrong. But I kept telling myself I had time to repent. I told myself I was a good person by the number of good deeds I did for others. After all, I was just an imperfect human like everyone else; surely there’s grace for me, I thought. Jesus still loves me and forgives me. Friends, this is a frequent tactic the enemy uses to keep us bound and apart from the full presence of God—the lie of time for repentance.
This lie kept me bound and broken all while believing in the full Gospel. The problem was I didn’t live the full Gospel. I believed, but I didn’t repent. Jesus was my savior, but He wasn’t Lord over my life.
Friends…Jesus can have no transformative power in your life if you don’t submit to Him. You see, I gave Him part of me, but I didn’t allow His convictions to change all of me. While I heard them, I chose to love my sin more. I lived like this from my teens to early twenties, until one day, right before I was ready to take my own life again at age 24, I had a supernatural encounter with Jesus.
As I was crying out to Him on the floor of my apartment building, I remember feeling His tangible presence all around me, comforting my soul, and whispering to me to let this entire life go, turn from my sin, and come follow Him.
It was that day at the end of 2019, that I chose to be forever radical and live my life entirely for Him. Once the decision was made, the sanctification process began. God had to humble me, prune all my relationships, change my environment, heal my inner wounds, and deliver me from various different demons. It was the first time in my life that I was not just a believer, but I was a DAUGHTER. I was free from the chains I was previously bound in, and I finally let my Father embrace all of me.
Friends…this is what my heart burns for. It is not just for you to believe that Jesus is the Son of God, died for your sins and for you to receive eternal life. NO! I believed that all my life, but it didn’t change me. Salvation is bread crumbs that fall from the table of a FEAST of His love and promises for you.
My heart burns for you to walk in the identity of a son and daughter of the King of the UNIVERSE! To know Him intimately is to know your purpose and calling. You weren’t just created for the things of this world; you were created to have His glory be manifested through you. You were created to be loved by your Father, know Him, become like Him, and bring your brothers and sisters back to Him.
This is the heart of Bold For Christ. It is for you to know your Father intimately, trust in Him, and give yourself entirely to Him. Boldness doesn’t come from our human efforts. Boldness is a gift that we receive when the power of the Holy Spirit comes upon us. We don’t work for it, we don’t deserve it, we simply become it when we behold the author of it.
You don’t walk Bold For Christ when you finally feel like it. You walk Bold For Christ when you declare that you’ll finally stop trying to live life on your own terms, and submit to choosing His will for you. This will the beginning of the life the deepest parts of you have been craving to experience.
“Let Your will be done Lord, and not my own.”